Monday, August 25, 2014

Lifting Lebanon

I can't believe it's already Pday again! This is crazy! This week just FLEW by. 

My shoutout this week goes to the beautiful and happy and ENGAGED couple: Tara Fantastic Wells and Ryan Studofaman Raymond Ross. Congratulations you stinking cute people. Congratufrikinglations. I could not be happier. Yes. #marriageisneat #doubleswiththeDawsons 

Alrighty then!

We had a great week last week! I was struggling really hard with being shy and not wanting to talk during tracting or even sometimes during the lessons. I don't know what was wrong with me. But this week I'm doing so much better! It was in a large part because we got to go on exchanges. 
Our Sister Training Leaders are dang incredible. I got to serve a whole day with Sister Wade, and I've never met someone in my whole life who compliments people as often and as sincerely as she does. She made me feel so good about myself. She was just about the most bubbly and outgoing missionary that I've ever met, so serving and teaching with her was a blast, and as easy as breathing! I don't know why, but it seems to be so much easier for me to open my mouth and be outgoing and optimistic with other people who are the same way. But I have been working this week to not let other people's moods and/or personalities affect my own! It has been an awesome week. Sister Wade helped me so much to see that I have a valuable part in this work, and she helped me to recognize my talents and attributes. She gave me some very valuable advice: "Stand where you are, and lift." Which means that, wherever you are in the world and whoever you are with, leave it better than it was when you arrived. 
So I have been working on lifting everything - our less actives, our part member families, our investigators, our creepy apartment, my district, even my trainer!  We have gotten so much closer this week! I am seriously doing so much better. It's great. 

We've met some awesome members this week who have fed us some seriously awesome food. Two incredible families that I have met are the Henson's and the Chakmakov's. The Henson's are awesome. Brother Henson is in the army and he served in Afghanistan. I have never seen a happier, closer family. Being with them was so simple and real. They're so down to earth. It was like a breath of fresh air. 
Brother Chakmakov is from Bulgaria and Sister Chakmakova is from Arizona I think, and she served her mission in Bulgaria. They are new to the ward and are looking for friends. I don't think they'll have a hard time with that. They're so open and friendly. I love them! They fed us awesome Mexican food. Yesss.
We also got to go out to an authentic Mexican restaurant one day for lunch. So good.
The members take such good care of us here. I'm gonna be gorda!! D:

We have had some funny stories this week with teaching and tracting and I am excited to share them with y'all.

First, we have A. Sister Tolman and her old companion met A one day when they had to call an ambulance for her. A. told them that if they called an ambulance she would let them come over and teach! So we went to go teach her and Sister Tolman was trying to get inside and A. was like "who are you?"
Hahaha she couldn't even remember that they had called an ambulance for her. She couldn't even remember going to to hospital. It was so funny. Crazy, beardy A. 

Then we've got good old R. We teach R. every Wednesday. R. likes to read scripture books and he likes to talk. A lot. This week, he had a bunch of questions about the godhead. He is just so sure that they're all one person. We were trying to explain to him using the Bible that they are three separate personages, but he wasn't having it. Then, during the closing prayer he started praying to the Holy Spirit. It was madness. Sister Tolman and I had to stifle our giggles. It was just such a classic mission moment. We left his house and I told Sister Tolman that I could die happy. 

Then there's a less active sister. I'm not exactly sure what her condition is, but apparently her spine is disintegrating or something? It's really bad and basically she just roams around waiting to die. It's so sad. We always do our best to help her be happy. But the thing is... I feel so uncomfortable at her house because she's always so scantily clad. She wears these little black lacey nightgowns that are totally see through and when she sits down on her chair she always lifts them up to adjust and totally flashes us! It's so awkward! I have to try so hard not to laugh. But we convinced her to come to church next Sunday so that's good! Hopefully she'll get dressed for that, though. 

Remember last week when I wrote about our new investigator S.? Well she has this bearded dragon named Lizzy. It's awesome. We always get to hold it when we go teach her.  But anyway, while we were on exchanges, Sister Doxy was with Sister Tolman and totally told Savannah that she could bring Lizzy to church! It was such a stressful moment. S. ended up forgetting about her commitment to come, so we did not have any dragons in the chapel... but it was so funny that we even had to worry about that. 

This week, we got two solid new investigators. :) J. is like a storybook investigator - her family is Catholic but she doesn't think that their church is true, she says she feels so much peace and comfort when we talk, she is excited to read the Book of Mormon. All good things. We love J. 
Then we have S. who is the sweetest little guy ever. He's a former Marine so I was so excited to jump in and tell him about Brandan. He agreed to be baptized on October 4th, and he came to church with us for all three hours yesterday and didn't want to leave! It was great! We had a powerhouse member with us during his lesson named Sister Seamans who was actually baptized just under a year ago last November. She was bearing her testimony and the spirit was so powerful I couldn't help but think "Geez. If people even feel HALF of this incredible Spirit when we speak as missionaries, no wonder people want to join the church." It was just such a verification to me that this church is so true. God speaks today and we can know of the truth of this gospel through the power of the Holy Ghost. 

Being a missionary is super cool! But we seriously can't do it without the help of the members! If you guys get an opportunity to go out with the missionaries or to feed them a meal or to give them a referral, please! Do! We need help from the members so much! You guys do more than I think that you know! We love our members here in Lebanon! They are like family. 

Everything is great! The Lord is furthering his work! I am so grateful for all of your prayers in my behalf. :) You guys are cool. 

I love you all! Yo se sin dudas que esta Iglesia es tan importante en la vidas de todos los hijos de Dios. Todos son Sus hijos. Todos necesitan el Evangelio de Jesucristo! Yo se que este Evangelio bendice a las familias y a los individuales. Estoy muy agradecida por esta oportunidad a servir aqui en Lebanon! La obra es maravillosa!! :) 

Love, Hermana Bills 

Sunday, August 24, 2014

Thank you President and Sister Johnson!

These pictures came from President and Sister Johnson - Brittani's mission president and his wife.

Tuesday, August 19, 2014

"Tell the world the Black Story"

We teach this black family and one day we were in the middle of a lesson and the little boy comes in and is like "momma! can we have waffles for dinner" and she's like "no." then he was like "can i have fried chicken!?" and she was like "no baby I'm making ribs"
then he was like "well can we at least have poptarts"
i almost peed.

Welcome to Gotham!

SHOUTOUT TO MY BEAUTIFUL MOTHER WHO TURNS 26 THIS WEEK. You babe. I just want you to know that you are my superhero. There is no way I would be out here on this mission right now if it weren't for everything that you have done for me. 
I think that all moms are superheroes. This week in relief society, we had a lesson on parents and I kept getting all teary-eyed because of all the mothers who felt like they were failing as parents. I couldn't help but think of my angel mother who was often too hard on herself. Mom, you are perfect. I love my mother. God loves mothers. Everyone, go kiss your moms. 

OKAY. Everyone prepare for an epic novel. I'm sorry for those of you who are about to suffer through and read this. It's going to be... well, epic. 

So first and most important, did you all know that Pittsburgh is where Batman was filmed!? Because I did not know that. So now it all makes sense that the Lord called me to serve here. My mission call is Gotham. I AM BATMAN. So it's like, not a big deal or anything. 

Nextly, I just want to say that I love being in the field. It's something new and exciting every single day, and that is fabulous and just what I need. 

So now I'm going back to the beginning. 
Leaving the MTC was hard, because I had to say goodbye to a lot of really good people. But, one good thing that happened the night that we left is that Brother Jones gave us a ride around campus on the golf cart. 
I was hanging off the end because there weren't enough seats for me to sit. I've never felt more alive. We were driving all over the grass in front of Thomas S. and causing massive mayhem. It was beautiful. 

My plane rides were good. I got to go from Mexico to Atlanta with three of the elders from my district in the MTC - Elders Shin, Munson and Lundgren. When we got to Georgia I had to say goodbye to Elder Shin and Elder Munson, so that was hard all over again. But I was just too happy to finally be going to Pennsylvania. 
When we got off the plane in the airport and made our way over to baggage claim, I was greeted by a firm hug from Sister Johnson.
I love my mission president and his wife. 
The first thing that we did once we were joined by the missionaries from the Provo MTC was to drive up to an overlook and to see the whole city. 
It was gorgeous and there was a rainbow stretching across the city... I wish I had a picture but I forgot to pack my camera cord because I'm a genius. 
Anyway. We had dinner at the mission home and I saw a cardinal and a bunch of fireflies! It was magic. I couldn't even believe my eyes! 

Then we had the transfer meeting to meet our new trainers. Guess who I saw there!? Elder Kevin Johnson. 
What a champion. All the new missionaries had to stand up and introduce themselves. When I stood up Elder Johnson let out a warcry and I blushed bright red. What a bum. 
Anyway! My trainer is Hermana Tolman. She's really nice but she's not a very good driver so...I can't wait till the end of this transfer where I'm allowed to drive. Haha. 
Slight interjection here. Let me just tell you about the dumbest thing that we do as missionaries. It's called backing. So the "co driver" (me) has to stand out of the car and wave my hands and help the driver back the car. Mind you, we have one of those fancy backing videos in our car so it's not really necessary... I guess I understand the principle. I just feel so stupid doing it. I get a lot of funny looks. Being a missionary is awesome but it's also pretty awkward. Oh well, I'm really good at being awkward. 
Other than the driving my companion is awesome! I got assigned to an area called Lebanon and it's kind of sketchy but there are a lot of people to teach here so I am not going to complain. Also, Elder Lundgren is in the same zone as me! We are hopefully getting together today as a zone to play some sports, but who knows for sure. 

So here in Lebanon everything is really old. It's nice but it's also not nice. Our apartment, for example, is just a little struggler. Some beautiful, blessed child of our Father in Heaven decided that they could just take a house and split it into four and make it into an apartment building. 
It's wonderful. Our bathroom used to be a porch. 
The nice thing about our apartment, though, is that we have our own washer and dryer. However, it's incredibly creepy because it's completely unfinished and we're like 13% sure that we have a basement dweller. There's kind of this lump of things over in the far corner that we've never gone and looked at. Pretty sure it's where the blessed little lad rests his head. We lock that door at night. 
We lock all of our doors at night, dad. Don't worry. 

The best thing about our area, though, is that if you go far enough out, you will see a lot of beautiful Mennonites, which is a dream come true. We were teaching an investigator named Titus the other day (he's crazy. He's been to jail. I love him.) and we have to teach him out on his porch and this Mennonite buggy just comes gallivanting by. 
Best day of my life. 

I am getting plenty of opportunities to practice my Spanish out here, as well. We have a couple of people from Mexican and I can communicate really well with them. But a lot of Spanish speakers in Lebanon (pronounced Leb nin) are from Puerto Rico. The fun thing about their Spanish is that's it's 
1. Really really fast
2. All slurred together
3. They don't finish their words (ie Nosotros would be said nosotro) 
It's madness. 
It's Sparta. 

Here's an awkward story for you. We have this member named Sister Fornasch. The members take such good care of us out here. In all the time I've been out, we've only had to make dinner once. They feed us so well, it's awesome. So we were headed to Sister Fornasch's home for a dinner appointment. I was super excited to meet her because my trainer told me she was a convert.
What she didn't tell me is that she is also from Cambodia. 
I couldn't understand a word she was saying! Have you ever listened to someone with a Cambodian accent!? 
It was so intense. I just had to sit there smiling and nodding. Until she asked me a question and I had no idea what to do. The awkwardness in that room... coulda cut it with a knife. 

But boy, oh boy can these people in Pennsylvania talk. They love to go on and on. I feel like in the MTC all I learned was how to get people to start talking, and now I have to learn how to get them to stop. 
They're all really sweet people though. I love them. 

We picked up two new investigators last week and it was awesome. One of them is named Savannah. She has a special place in my heart cause she was my first "new investigator". We met her when were contacting someone that we had run into on the street while tracting one day. We went to teach him and she came into the room in the middle of the lesson and stayed and was super interested in the Book of Mormon. The other guy (Frank) ended up leaving mid lesson which was funny, but what are ya gonna do, you know? Here's the cool thing, though. We were teaching Savannah about the Restoration on our second appointment and I got to invite her to be baptized and she accepted! It was incredible! So I'm 1 for 1 now and I guess you could say that's a pretty impressive track record ;) 
We are supposed to teach her again tomorrow night but I'm going on splits with the Sister training leaders so I don't get to teach her and I'm so mad! :( 

But anyway! I think that's most of my stories. I mean, obviously I have tons more, but I don't want to bore you all to death. I want you guys to know that I love missionary work! It's so good to be out here in the field, getting real things done! The people in Pennsylvania are incredible. Pennsylvania is gorgeous! There's so much corn!

Oh, did I mention that Lebanon is right next to Hershey? So we are going to try to go to Hershey park for one of our Pdays.
Be jealous. 
I also think that we might be JUST close enough to the DC temple to have a member take us. It has to be a 2 hour drive or less, so we're going to find out for sure. I will keep you guys posted. 

But! Yesterday we got to meet with Elder Anderson from the 70 and I just want to share with y'all something that I learned before I go. We were talking about the importance of the Holy Ghost as we are teaching. As missionaries, we know that our investigators will never really be converted if the spirit is not in the room while we teach. 
This work (and this gospel) is spiritual work. We can't understand it or teach it without the Spirit, because we are bearing witness of truth and knowledge of spiritual things. We talk about our spirits that existed in the premortal life. We talk of the Savior and His atonement that will heal us spiritually. We talk about the importance of treating our bodies with respect because they house our spirits. It's all spiritual. This is a work of faith and a work of the Spirit. 
If you want to work on your faith, do things consistently that invite the Spirit. We practice humility and charity before we can hope to develop faith, and then faith brings hope and knowledge. 

The gospel is cool.

I want to leave you with my testimony that this is Christ's church, and it is so true. I would not be out here preaching to these people every day if I did not know it is true. If you don't have the same knowledge, ask God. He will never hold back from His beloved children. 
Maybe even meet with the missionaries ;) Just a thought... haha.

I love you guys! Thank you for your support! 
Talk to you all next week. :) 

Love, Hermana Bills

Thursday, August 7, 2014

The last... *slurp melon

FIRST OFF. Shoutout to Courtney Nichole Crockett. I don't know about you but she's feeling 22. AND SHE'S THE MOST BEAUTIFUL 22 YEAR OLD ON THE PLANET. 
I love you Court! 

It's my last couple of days here in the CCM! I'm so stoked to be leaving and this last week has been incredible! I can't believe that in three more days I'll be waking up and heading back to the airport! 

I have loved serving here with all of these wonderful people in my district. I have had the most incredible learning experiences and opportunities for growth, and all of my teachers have moved me to change and become a better person! I feel my Savior's love in my bones and I have His words in my heart. I'm so grateful for His love and sacrifice for each and every one of us!

So usually I keep a little paper of things throughout the week that I'm going to tell you all about. But this week I accidentally left it in the classroom so you're just going to get my random thoughts. 

So more in the way of praying for food. This last week we've had some pretty sketchy food stuffs. We swear the the way the food looks going in is the same way it looks coming out sometimes. So I was going to cry one day cause we had just gotten done fasting and then they had this nasty rubbery turkey. It was cold and covered in like watery gravy... I just... yeah. So luckily we have this nutella bar where you can go make toast and stuff and put nutella on it. So Hermana Burnham and I were like "let's just get toast". But sometimes the circuts get overheated or something? I don't really know anything about anything. But the toasters won't work when it happens. So that happened when I was trying to get my toast and I was like "no. this can't be happening."
Ladies and gentlemen, I stood right there in front of my toaster and prayed to my Father for it to work. He's got to be shaking His head at me up there in heaven. But when I put my bread in that toaster and pushed the button down, my toaster worked even though all the other ones still weren't working.
It's a dumb example, obviously. But the Lord answers prayers. 
Hermana Burnham was like, "that did not just happen."
So classic. 

Also this week I got to meet both of my maetros novias. I was so happy. Hermano Garza and His novia were so cute. Before we said goodbye to them, he told us that after our mission we have to find a reason to keep progressing. Then he looked at his novia (angelica) and said "And right now, she is mine." The cutest thing was that he said it in English and she can't understand a single word so she had no idea what was happening. It was beyond precious. 
Also I got asked on a date out here. So that was completely awkward and I turned beet red. Also I said no in case y'all are wondering.

Fast Sunday was cool. I love bearing my testimony in Spanish. Spanish is so cool! Also, every Sunday we have movie night and this week we watched the testaments. It was so neat. Afterward, reading the Book of Mormon was a completely different experience. It really came to life. I finished it this week and prayed to know it it's true! if anyone is wondering what answer I got, you should check out Moroni 10:4 through 5! good stuff! 

Since it was our last week this week, we got to host! They started doing this new thing here at the CCM because we keep getting these MASSIVE groups of missionaries where the districts who are getting to leave get to help out on Wednesdays to take the new missionaries to their homes. It's seriously the coolest experience. Our house has been empty for a week and a half now but we finally got housemates and we got to help them move in! It was aweeesommeee!! 

Okay I'm out of time so I'll end with one more story. We have this friend in the post office here named Alicia and this week we got to meet her daughter. Her daughter doesn't speak English so I got to have a conversation with her and I was just so happy with how much I could speak! She's so cute. Her name is Dani. 

Anyway. I get to send out one more email on Saturday before I leave for Pittburgh on Monday so I'll fill you all in on anything I left out! 
I'm so excited to get to the field! 
This work is incredible!! :) 

The Representative by Hermana Brittani Bills

The Representative
By Hermana Brittani Bills

So very far away from home, 1,000 miles at best
The trip was long and tiring and I'm ready for a rest 
I take my first step off the bus into the MTC
And say a little prayer to ask the Lord to strengthen me.
I'm feeling sort of awkward... What am I supposed to do? 
The elders grab the luggage; do I help them get it, too?
Then a lady comes out smiling and helps to calm my fear
"Oh hermanas! Nice to meet you. It's so good to have you here."
I walk into a building with a smile now on my face.
The Spirit of my Lord is here. I'm happy in this place. 
Then they hand to me my nametag and I've never felt so blessed
When I took my Savior's name and I put it on my chest.

The weeks are like the lightning: They're there, you blink, they're gone
And yet somehow days pass slowly like a long and lazy yawn 
There's so much here to learn and do, so much to read and write
The Spirit fills our hearts with peace and fills our minds with light
The scriptures make more sense to me than they ever have before
And when I pray for answers, Christ opens up the door
In my life, I swear I've never cried as much as I do here
I feel God's love so powerfully and they are happy tears
I've felt His will become my own as my heart to Him is turned
I've eaten from the tree of life and this pearl of price I've learned
I never have to be alone, I'm never walking blind
When I take my Savior's words of life and put them in my mind. 

This life is so much different from the way I lived before
I'm here to find my family who are craving something more
I'm learning how to find them, how to serve them day by day
I know the Lord will help me if I have faith and pray
I think about them often, about their friends, their passions, lives
They're all a part of something. They are children, fathers, wives.
I pray they might be happy and have strength in all they do 
That their blessings may be many and their trials may be few
I feel my Savior's love for them as day by day I learn 
How I'll help them feel the love of Christ and to his arms return
I'm just a girl, I can't do much but I start to do my part
When I take my Savior's endless love and put it in my heart.

A member of the church of Christ and a missionary
They say I represent Him and that like Him I must be
I'm told to ask for faith and hope and charity and love
An eye single to the glory of my Father up above.
So I try my hardest every day to be obedient
But I often think it's just too hard and all my strength is spent
My Savior was a perfect man, can I hope to be like HIM?
Can I be a light for others when the way seems dark and dim? 
All I know is Christ's my shepherd and He wants me to succeed
Which is why He chose to die for us: chose to suffer, chose to bleed
I understand Christ's love for me and the power of His grace
When I know my Savior's countenance and see it in my face. 

Friday, August 1, 2014

Stay on Target! Stay on Target!

For all of you who didn't get that reference... I'm sorry. 

So first of all, THANKS MOM FOR THE KRISPY KREME. You're the best! My district and my teachers and my friends here at the CCM and I all loved them! You're the best person ever! 

It was so funny! Hermano Muñoz is our teacher at night and he has the worst sweet tooth I've ever seen. He always asks to eat all of our candy. So when I got donuts, we ate the whole first box as a district and then it was empty. So we decided to prank Hermano Muñoz. When he got to class, I was like, "Hey! We got something for you!" And brought out the empty box of donuts and gave it to him. We weighed it down with our language notebook and when he saw the box, his face lit up. Krispy kreme is so expensive for the Mexicans here, so they never get them. Then I gave him the box and he opened it and his face was PRICELESS. Like stone cold, eyebrows furrowed, just looking at me like "Legit, Hermana Bills?" But him and I are always playing pranks on each other so it was fine. And then I gave him a donut from the box that wasn't gone so he was happy again.

Pdays on Thursdays have turned out to be a blessing because Hermana Stoddard and I were the only ones in our whole house who had pday on Thursday so we've had the washers and dryers to ourselves every week. But that doesn't matter anymore because on Tuesday morning all of the sisters went to the field! It's just us and our two roommates in the whole house! Kind of eerie. We thought we would get new housemates on Wednesday with the new shipment of missionaries, but we didn't. So weird. But it's been really nice because now we can all shower at the same time if we just use the showers in the other rooms and I've been getting to bed earlier, which is good since I got a stupid cold or something. Like a head cold and a cough. My immune system is so pansy. Somebody isn't praying hard enough for me. Come on, people ;) 
(Just kidding)

Okay so here's some funny stories about learning Spanish. 
Just for your information, before I begin the stories.
In Spanish, hombre = man and hombro = shoulder
casada = married, cansada = tired
cuarto = room, cuaderno =notebook
So they're all pretty similar.
The first story is of me. We were teaching our investigator Raul, and we had planned the word of wisdom and were asking him how he was doing living the ten commandments. He told us about how he has a girlfriend and how he likes to sleep around. I was just caught of guard at first cause it's our teacher Hermano Garza acting as an investigator, and that's the last thing you expect to hear. So I told him about why not committing adultery is so important and how marriage is sacred and is an incredible opportunity to become closer to God and understand the love of Christ. Then we started on the lesson on the Word of Wisdom. I was trying to explain how if we don't take care of our bodies, the spirit can't dwell in us. In English, I wanted to say "If we debilitated, or even sick or tired, it's very difficult to feel the spirit." instead, I told him that if he was married (casada vs. cansada) he would have a hard time feeling the spirit.
Right after I told him how important marriage was.

Here's two about my companion. First, we were talking about marriage between a man and woman while we were teaching the law of chastity. But instead, she said marriage is between a shoulder and a woman.
Too funny.
Then we were teaching about prophets and how they receive revelation from God, and she was sharing an experience from general conference and trying to say that the spirit was so strong when the prophet walked into the room but instead she said She felt the spirit so strong when Thomas S. Monson walked into the notebook.
And I had to cover my laugh with a cough.

Classic moments, my friends.

In other news, the Hermana's and I always have classic moments. Hermana Burnham and I were playing tennis against Hermana Stoddard and Hermana Meads one day for gym and we lost 4 times in a row. I think we only won twice by sheer luck. It was so funny. We have some really impressive tennis grunts, though. But we love to play tennis. We try to as much as we can. The other day I got really mad though because there was this Elder who checked out the rackets at 9am and hid them in his classroom so no one else could use them the whole day. Then when he went to play, he couldn't cause some other kids were playing soccer on the tennis court. Then the guy in charge of sports came and yelled at him and now they have a rule that you can only check the equipment out for 50 minutes at a time. 
Thanks a lot, Elder Farley. 

Haha, here's a good story. The other day at lunch time they had these peppers in the rice, and our whole district was super excited. they looked like jalapeños or something. 
They weren't.
The first elder bit into one and his eyes immediately filled up with tears. So then we took turns going around the table biting into these super burning hot peppers and watching everyone cry and laughing. The other hermanas wouldn't do it, but I joined in with the elders. It burned my tongue and lips and throat so bad. Hilarious. The last person to do it was elder cates. he's so stinking funny. he bit the pepper and it took about two seconds for it to hit and his face when red and he started getting tears and he was like. "oh. Okay." and then like 4 seconds later he grabs Elder Ellis and is like, "Dude! Am I gonna live!?" 
I couldn't breathe. It was so funny. 

This email is enormous...

The other night we were having district discussion and the Elder that's coming to Pittsburgh with me was talking about how he thought it's so honorable for sisters to serve and how he has so much respect for us and it was so sweet. I got so emotional.

I'm so blessed to be out here on my mission. I am so blessed to be a Sister Training Leader and to have the opportunity to serve 13 amazing sisters in my zone. They teach me so much. I am humbled every day by their example and their strength. 
Being out here on a mission is so hard. I miss being home. I get so home sick. But I know that there are people that I promised I would bring the gospel to in the premortal life, and I am going to find them. Just like my body feels homesickness, my spirit feels it too. I know that one day, I will return to my Heavenly Father. If I don't do my best and give my all here in this mission, I will feel horrible for breaking my promises. So I'm going to give it my all.
I've been learning so much. I just want to share with you all something I learned about faith this past week. The answer is always faith! 
Faith is believing and hoping for that which you cannot see, but it is also so much more. Hope and faith are power. Faith is the power by which the Lord brings miracles into our lives. Faith requires trust and humility, and true faith lead to charitable actions. Faith turns into knowledge, it grows. I have felt my faith grow here. immensely. 
I love serving a mission. I love studying this gospel. And even though I miss home, I know that this is where the Lord wants me to be! 
Thank you for your thoughts and prayers. you are incredible! 

Hermana Bills